Ramona's Bad Art | Abstract
Last week, I was in a real bad emotional state. An event occurred, which in turn brought a lot of bad memories and PTSD bubbling to the surface. It was bad; screaming and crying and throwing shit around my home because I was not in a rational place to know how to handle myself otherwise. This burst of work was the result of this breakdown. I don't do abstract stuff simply because it looks cool. It's a cathartic way of relieving stress and bad brain shit. I'm throwing (digital) paint around and inadvertently creating patterns and color schemes in the process. Doing things on accident seems to be how I ended up where I'm at in life. These pieces represent my emotional state. Wishing I could talk it out with someone, without holding myself for fear of burdening someone else with my problems. My frequent nightmares of losing myself or someone I care about. Using bright colors as a form of wish fulfillment; wanting to appear radiant and beautiful, not embittered and full of anger. But no matter what, I find myself beholden to my grudges and my past. And blood. It wouldn't be a trans girls art without imagery reminiscent of blood and slime. I mean, duh.