Late Night Ramble

I’m finally getting around to listening to Against Me! after pretty much living under a rock regarding punk music for the last several years. I figured I would listen to Laura Jane Grace as a form of solidarity, you know?

And suddenly, out of nowhere, I just got hit with this chest-tightening sense of existentialist dread and gender dysphoria. I’ve mentioned before not liking to look at old photos of myself, or having to my use legal name in my day-to-day life. Fuck, what if I had to go through all this shit being a notable celebrity in the public eye? Having transphobic media figures constantly misgendering me, deadnaming me, and telling the world at large that I’m some circus freak, in addition to all the internal struggles I have is something I don’t think I could handle. Just thinking about it was absolutely terrifying; living it would probably kill me.

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