Back in “the day,” as it were, I used to post on a video game message board. The other posters were grown ass men nearing their 40’s who never moved on from the Sega Genesis-Super Nintendo console wars (Sega was a perfect, gentle soul, and Nintendo were gay homos dragging America down a moral sewer), and still blamed Sony for the death of the Dreamcast. They were also extremely misogynist, racist, and homophobic. I wouldn’t be surprised if most, if not all, of them are proud Gamergate flag-bearers these days. I didn’t stick around this place long.
Anyways. One of them was having a serious crisis of conscience, and turned to his friends in his hour of need. You see, No More Heroes had just come out, and he really wanted to play it. The problem was that it was on the Nintendo Wii, which, as far as these guys were concerned, was a console that would turn you gay if you looked at it for too long and WHAT IF A GIRL COMES OVER SHE’LL NEVER HAVE SEX WITH ME NOW. Keep in mind these were grown men in their mid-late 30’s.
Eventually, the dude bit the bullet bought the system and the game.
About a week later, he wrote this long post describing how he had finished the game, then proudly sold his copy of No More Heroes and his Wii. He was done with that gay shit for queers! He was a man again!
Until another Wii game he wanted came out.
So he bought the system, again, and whatever game it was he wanted. He finished that game, too, and, again, sold both the Wii and the game. This happened at least two or three more times! This guy bought four or five Wiis, and proudly wasted thousands of dollars because he was worried people on the internet would think less of him as a man. He was that homophobic that he was willing to lose all that money because he thought a video game console was like a homosexual honey trap. And this wasn’t some weird bullshit story designed to troll a board of assholes, he posted pictures of the receipts as proof. Proof that he was still rugged and tough, I guess.
I have no clue where he is these days. Probably on Twitter sending out vile shit to Zoe and Anita, and muttering, “I’m a man, dammit” to himself as he waits in line for the Splatoon midnight release.