hey i’m going to talk about cyberpunk

Hey, it’s been a while since I’ve done one of these “I’m mad about a thing” rant posts. Something in my brain broke back in August, where I realized that my appeal to empathy or reason ultimately went nowhere, and I was much happier talking about retro games and cars, so these kind of posts stopped. But fuck it, I’m fucking annoyed about some shit. Also, I caught a cold last week, and I haven’t had the energy to do anything worth posting about, unless you’re all dying to hear my stories of passing out in my chair while watching Tekken match videos on YouTube after I took some cough syrup.

Fucking Cyberpunk. I have had zero goddamn interest in this game since it was announced. I didn’t give a fuck about The Witcher, a game starring what is probably the whitest man in the history of video games, and I certainly didn’t give a fuck about anything else made by the same company. It’s been clear that CD Projekt Red is pretty openly hostile to People Like Me. That, and the whole massive exploitation of their employees. But mostly being the same kind of boring assholes posting lol trannie shit that we were already rolling our collective eyes at in 2014. Who cares? There are better games worthy of my time and my money. I could spend $60 on it now, or even better, wait and get No More Heroes 3 or Resident Evil 8. At worst, those games will still be more interesting and profound than Cyberpunk’s best moments.

It’s going to come out. It’s already received glowing reviews, probably because the coyote physics are really dope or whatever. It’ll have a legion of idiots sending death threats on the game’s behalf if you so much as imply that maybe it isn’t that great.

And I guess that’s my problem. Not so much the game itself; it’s no different than any other soulless AAA horseshit with cynical marketing designed to establish a parasocial relationship with the audience. Taking away the trans shit, there’s not much a leap between this and Red Dead Redemption 2, The Last of Us 2, or Ghosts of Tsushima. Same shit, different day. It’s this limp reaction from games outlets that’s getting me here. At risk of using a controversial term here, these fucking virtue signaling platitudes of “oh, well, crunch is bad, and stuff” or “transphobia? not cool, man!” then giving out these Gamepro exploding heads after spending six months to a full year providing breathless preview coverage.

Now the real point of this whole post: I know for a fact that several of these writers will hem and haw over the game, who have also used their platforms to tell people not to support me. I don’t mean me in the sense of small independent creators, or even trans people in general (though that’s pretty firmly implied), I mean specifically games writers screaming DO NOT GIVE RAMONA YOUR TIME OR MONEY. DO NOT SUPPORT THIS DUMB BITCH.

And boy if that ain’t the most sinister shit! Please bear with me here, because I’m about to open up that stable door and pull out that dead horse and beat it some more. This is year five. I’m still the subject of poorly-written call out posts and nonsensical conspiracy theories that make me out to be part of some underground cabal of mean trannies that hurt the feelings of your favorite personalities after they called us all a bunch of pedophiles based on something a neo-nazi told them. I’m kinda sorta extremely fucking over it, dude. Over the constant berserker barrage of stupid fucking reasons to hate me based entirely on video game articles I didn’t write, Twitter posts I never made, or somehow being ultra-close best friends with someone I’ve never spoken to in my life that went on to become a right-wing grifter. You got all these clowns at Kotaku, or Waypoint, or Polygon calling us all a bunch of bigots while they themselves do shit like write articles loaded with glowing praise for a bunch of rapists or make YouTube videos playing Final Fantasy with a guy that hangs around Proud Boy supporters.

At least hate me because of something I did, you know? Maybe you don’t like my personality? You think my art sucks? Not a fan of my streams? Maybe I beat you too badly in a round of Tekken 7? Probably not enough reason to tell potentially hundreds of thousands of people that the Antichrist is actually some no-name trans artist with a couple hundred followers, but at least you sound less like Woke Infowars.

pictured: me and the girls plotting to get black women fired from kotaku, apparently

I’m not the only one in this position; there are others who have been fired from their jobs, had their PayPals shut down, or even lost their homes. By comparison, I’ve gotten off (lol) pretty easily. But hey, this is my blog, where I put down my thoughts and my feelings, so I will be selfish and talk about myself. My opinion is that it’s a bunch of bullshit that, in the eyes of Big Gaming, giving me five bucks because you liked something I made? You may as well have given that money to Hitler himself. Giving $60-$90 to a major corporation that commits gross violations of labor and is run by reactionary bigots? That’s Socialism, baby!

Once a week, there’s some new discourse topic that calls trans people a bunch of degenerate sex rapists. There’s always some “main character” that’s done something so immensely fucked up like, “made a dick joke,” “accidentally got really popular,” “follows a guy who follows a guy who follows a guy who follows a guy who follows a guy who follows a guy’s cousin who said the r-word on LiveJournal back in 2006,” or some other reason that’s extremely petty and most certainly made up. All it takes is someone waking up on the wrong side of the bed to turn a human being into a punching bag for both sides of the political divide. It owns, living in this perpetually gaslit society where you are subject to constant harassment and abuse, are called a liar and a neo-nazi for pointing this out, and then get accused of molesting at least thirty children by the time I finish this sentence. Hell, someone with too much time on their hands will probably screencap segments of this very post, try to scrub any context, and do exactly what I just said would happen.

Take all of this into consideration, and look at what’s coming out in three days. Cyberpunk 2077. A game that you have been told, by multiple trans people, is really shitty towards us. There will be so many critics who will be twisting themselves into a pretzel to try and justify the purchase of and playing of the game, if they haven’t done so already. So many people trying to tie some heroic tale to “buying a video game.” We have to support the poor, overworked developers! NEWSFLASH! The developers have already been paid! Oh, but there was a promise that they would all receive a 10% bonus for the rest of the year based on sales? IT’S DECEMBER! The only thing you’re doing is swimming through massive amounts of cognitive dissonance because you don’t want to say out loud that you don’t want a bunch of whiny SJW transgenders getting in the way of you enjoying what looks to be the most boring looking pile of garbage, but now with Keanu Reeves. I would have much more respect for that entire industry if they would just be honest. Either say that you don’t give a fuck, or just straight up admit that yeah, you hate the trannies. We already know that you do. No amount of obnoxious memes of Sonic the Hedgehog saying that there’s no ethical consumption under capitalism will absolve you.

It’s hard to look at all of this swirling tornado of shit, and not take it personally to some degree. That a bunch of alt-right boardroom execs with shit-eating grins are more worthy of support than I am. This constant biting of my tongue every time something like this happens is exhausting. Having to swallow my pride whenever a friend says that they’ll simply pirate the game, or wait for it to go on sale first. Like there’s a fucking time limit and budget for how much our feelings are worth. Like there’s an embargo on the concept of allyship. Can’t believe Hatsune Miku made an entire futuristic FPS by herself.

So yeah, fuck Cyberpunk. Fuck this whole toxic dinosaur that is games culture. Consider leaving us the fuck alone, instead of stalking our social media, trying to run our best and brightest out of public life, and rubbing it in our faces that you really love a shitty video game that treats us all like an absolute joke. Leave me to the niche that I fill that you think is so clearly below you, even though most of you critics out there couldn’t handle my jock on my worst day. I have cough syrup to drink, fighting games to get better at, and an unexplored world of old media to analyze.

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